Minimally, I have to bookmark last night’s phone call for another moment where I am so proud of you. It was a Wednesday night call, and on both Monday and Tuesday nights, we had talked about someone at school, whose name begins with a ‘B’, who had been being a bully to you and Harper and other friends. She was being a ‘Mean Girl’, which is a term from a great movie about girls in school who form ‘cliques’ and are mean to other girls. One of the things that you and I had talked about a few times, was that when you know that you haven’t been mean to someone, and they are being mean to you, the way they are acting probably doesn’t have ANYTHING to do with you. They are probably experiencing some difficulty at home that is frustrating them, and they are taking it out on other people. I’ve shared with you the saying, “Hurt people, hurt people.” Meaning, people that have been hurt at home, or from loved ones, are the ones that are out in the world hurting other people.
We continue to laugh about the meme I sent you that says, “If you’re pretty, you’re pretty; but the only way to be beautiful is to be loving. Otherwise, it’s just, “Congratulations about your face.” 🙂
This girl likes to try to be the ringleader at lunch and at recess, commanding a group of girls in a particular activity, and excluding a couple people from the group activity. “Sorry, no room at the table. See you later.” or “We can only have four people doing this, so you and Harper are going to have to do something else.” She tries to put forth the image that she is perfect. She criticizes the most trivial things, like ponytails and clothes. She criticizes even when you TRY to look nice and say that you, McKenna, have an attitude that you think you are better than others when you look nice. She says odd things like, “You need to have some discipline, or there are going to be consequences.” Those are things she is clearly hearing from home.
Yesterday at school, she was yelling at Harper about something ridiculous, and you stepped in and told her to stop it and that you and Harper were no longer going to be her friends. She started yelling at you, and not only did other kids hear how awful she was being, but she was made to sit by “the pole” by a teacher, which I guess is the playground version of “Time-out”.
I have always said that you are a leader. We have talked about how you are lucky to be born to parents and family who love you, and that you are LUCKY to be so pretty. I have called on you to use what you have; your kindness, your sense of humor, your intelligence, and your compassion, to not only stand up for yourself, but to stand up for others. This is not the first time that you have. You did it at Hillcrest another time. I’m sure that there will be many more times throughout your life.
I also love that you are not afraid to talk to me about when there is a problem at school and to work things out with me to find a way that works best. Usually, those bullies realize that you were right. They see how you were a good friend to that person whom you defended, and they want someone like you as their friend. They come around to you and stop bothering you. That is you, being a peaceful stand for what you know is right. That is you, being a leader, and I am continually so proud of who you are.
Our Life 